My life at Miceli's, Part 2 (11/08/06)

... It was at that moment that I burned that poor girl on her naked back that the guy she was out with says to me, "Hey! Charlie! How are you?!" In that split second I went from sadness over Jill's condition, to extremely apologetic over the loss of this poor girls first layer of skin, to shocked over seeing this guy and then incredibly humored by what I will explain. You see, the guy who was having dinner with said burn victim was none other than Tommy Mooseknuckles, a guy about 23 years old, who comes into Miceli's on a semi-regular basis.
The very first time Tommy Mooseknuckles came to Miceli's he had a party of about five and put his name in as "Mooseknuckles", which apparently is a synonym for camel toe which is a common pejorative term for the shape that emerges from between a women's legs when she is wearing pants that are too tight, e.g., the shape of a moose’s knuckle.
Tommy was banking on the hope that I would announce loudly, “Mooseknuckles, party of five. Mooseknuckles…” I didn’t get the joke because I hadn’t heard the term before. I inquired because he gave the name in such a schmarmy way that I knew something was fishy, pun intended, He explained, I obliged and we all had a good laugh.
Well, because of that memorable incident I have called Tommy, “Mr. Mooseknuckles” ever since, often times forgetting his real name. And about two weeks ago and a VERY busy Sunday night, Tommy walks in with his out-of-town buddy, Jake. They come in, I promise them a short wait and a good table as always and they sit down,
Shortly after arrives a party of two cute girls. They put their name in and take a seat near Tommy and Jake. I walk over to the guys, chat it up for a minute and offer to buy them drinks so Tommy looks like he’s got some pull at his local hang out. As I turn I see the two girls looking at me like they’re thirsty so I think, “what the hell” and offer to buy them a round.
I after I had dropped off the refreshments I soon realize that the four are talking and hitting it off nicely. I also notice that I haven’t got any deuces (restaurant slang for a two person table) available at the moment but I DO have a four-top. I call Tommy over under the guise that he’s got a phone call. I ask him if he wants me to suggest that the four grab a table together, you know, to help ME out. He agrees and I slyly make my proposal to the other three and they take the bait.
I pass by a couple of times to chat it up and at the end of the night I see that they’ve exchanged numbers. Tommy gives me a, “we’ll see what happens” type of look. They leave. And here, two weeks later, who do I brand like a baby calf on the ranch but Christina, one of the very same girls that I set Tommy and Jake up with, on like their third date, really enjoying each other’s company. It was the weirdest experience. I was so overwhelmed by all stimuli that I could hardly process all the pieces of the experience. So I just started laughing as I gave Christina a big hug and apologized profusely for searing her like ahi tuna. After that they left and I took their unfinished plate of nachos cause I hadn’t had the opportunity to eat at work. They were good.
That, plus the nachos and the Crown & Coke really lightened my mood even though I still felt the sting of the night’s previous events. Life is so strange sometimes. Tragedy and comedy all mashed up together. I’ll tell you what though, I had a really good time with my work wives. They love on me so much. When I sneakily picked up the tab they covered me in kisses and hugs and mashed their boobs on me. It was great. I had a wide ass grin on my face. I love them.